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Giving Dreams Another Wag: Rediscovering Passion After Loss

Hey there, fellow wild amazing dreamer! Today, I want to share a personal journey with you. It's the story of me reviving my blog and instagram. Its about giving my dreams another chance, impacted by the terrible loss of my special dog and a wake-up call from a job that simply doesn't value what actually matters in life.

A woman petting her dog on the trail

The Passing of my Dog was Painful  

Several months ago, I said goodbye to the sweetest thing that I have ever known, my trustee companion, and my source of unconditional love – my dog. When she died I slipped into a depression. She left a huge void. I felt detached from reality, and my heart started physically hurting. I was a mess. The evening that my dog passed, I let my boss know what happened, and that I wouldn’t be coming in. She didn’t even ask if I was ok, the first thing she said was she WISHED she could do something. “We are so short-staffed and several people are on vacation you need to come in.” I still kept trying to get the day off to grieve. I texted her early in the morning saying that I couldn’t stop crying, but all my boss told me was that there were not enough people to get through the day! I mean I tried to be empathetic, and I knew that we had a huge staffing problem and that my boss had been super stressed about it. However, I felt hurt because I had gone above and beyond for them, and I couldn’t believe she would want me to come in when I was clearly not ok. 

 Grief at Work: When Losing a Pet Reveals the True Value of Priorities

My husband told me to not show up anyway, but I couldn’t risk getting fired. So, begrudgingly  I went to work angry. I was crying, with no makeup, and eyeglasses because I could not get my contacts in. My boss sees me but says nothing. My students had to see me crying and upset and they never should have had to. My coworkers were supportive and they thought my boss’s decision was wrong. One of my co-workers told me that, some people aren't animal people, like my boss, and they just don’t understand that dogs are FAMILY!  My Girlie was not just a dog, she was instrumental in my dad staying sober, she was a comfort to me during many turbulent changes like COVID! She was so much more than a pet! 

The entire day I was expected to work like there was nothing wrong. I felt horrible that I ended up working at a place where my grief was dismissed, and my emotional well-being took a backseat to numbers and productivity. To them, I was just a body they needed to get through the day.  Forced to mask my pain, I became angrier and angrier.  NOT once did anyone in management ask if I was ok, or acknowledge anything.

My workplace has always been like this. They always put profits over people. I have so many examples and horror stories. Also,  I had been mistreated and burnt by jobs before, but this broke the camel’s back. For the next few weeks, I couldn’t help but feel sad about all the time I spent working at that place and not with my husband and dog. A place that doesn't care about the teachers and children but profits over their well-being. 

man walking with his dog at sunset

From Tears to Triumph: Transforming Heartache into Motivation

It took everything in me not to get mad at people who would tell me I should just “GET OVER” my sweet dog’s death. On my lunch breaks, I would look at the pictures of Girlie, wishing I could go back and live in those moments. I know my doggie would not want me

dog by the river on a trail
My Sweet Girlie at one of her favorite spots!

to be angry, bitter, and sad. I also had to be strong for my family and Girlie’s little brother Ollie. As I watched the leaves roll past the sidewalk I knew I decided it was time to make some changes.  I joined a pet loss support group and found ways to connect with others who understand what it’s like to lose a furry friend. 

I also decided that I was done having a job have such a hold on me and my life. I needed to take a chance on myself, and I needed to work on something that was just mine! It’s hard for me to admit but it took losing my dog and enduring heartache at work to ignite a spark within me – a crazy desire to reclaim my dreams and prioritize what truly matters. I refuse to let anyone invalidate the significance of my loss or devalue the precious moments I shared with my dog.

Reviving Passion After Loss: The Power of Honoring a Pet's Legacy

So, here I am, dusting off my aspirations that have sat on the shelf far too long, reviving my blog, and actually posting on my Instagram – not just for me, but in honor of the loyalty and love my dog showed to me. Also, every time I pour into something that’s mine, is an act of rebellion against the grip work so often has on us, and a chance to change how our society views the loss of our animals. My sweet dog’s memory fuels my determination to create a space where people feel seen, heard, and understood, especially in their moments of loss and vulnerability.

Let's give our dreams another chance – for ourselves, for our furry friends, and for the journey ahead. Leave me a comment let me know what you think! 🐾✨ #DreamAgain #WaggingOn #NewBeginnings

Hi! I am Paulie D. from Notes from My Hammock. I write about living authentically, freedom, nature, and mental well- being......all with dogs!

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